Incongruence is simply a lack of coherence in attitudes, behaviors, and beliefs. For example, saying the opposite of what we think and doing the opposite of what we say. Hence the famous saying "do what I say but not what I do." How wise is our Popular Proverb!
In our language, we use synonymous terms, such as incoherence, inconsistency or absurdity. Therefore, logic and consistency would be antonyms.
When we speak we have to abide by some basic logical rules. If our words do not respect logical principles, there is an incongruity. In this sense, the foundation of non-contradiction is a criterion of congruence, because we cannot say that something is a thing and at the same time it is not (Juan is tall but short does not comply with this principle). The principle of identity is another fundamental criterion, since a thing is necessarily equal to itself. These two principles are clear examples of laws of thought that affect language. The fact of not respecting them implies a clear incongruity.
Some figures of speech have a certain incongruity, but it is not a strict contradiction, but a language game. For example, the paradox we express talking about a silent music, Santa Teresa famous verse " I live without living in me, " or description of someone like a man rich and poor. The theater of the absurd and surrealist art also have a clear illogical and incongruous meaning, but this does not mean that they are meaningless.
Sometimes we affirm things that contradict our actions. If I say that I am a person with good feelings but did not help others, I am saying an incongruity, because what I say and what I do do not coincide.
Incongruity is not necessarily a lie, as someone can honestly believe that they are telling the truth, even if their words are not true. The lack of correspondence between the words we say and our behavior is the expression of an internal contradiction.
If someone wants to achieve a goal but does not act accordingly, we find another contradiction. Therefore, if I say that I want to improve my English but I no longer study, I am being incongruous.
